Espelund ART(blog)

Love is not dependent, but dependency can grow from love…

Love makes even the toughest one go weak, the smartest to compromize, the most independent to fall into dependency…

Love makes people reconsider their options… Or act stupid… It’s not blind, but frees our primitive instincts as human beings… The need to give, get, feel safe and be…

You shall never find someone that will handle your amount of love, and possibly return and share, because romantic love as a one way street is destructive, and one way streets can lead to crashes when driving in opposite directions…

Release your passion and love the most, where the love given and returned is on an equal level naturally… Unlimited… Because true love will never ask or limit or set boundaries…, …it just is…

After much hard work, my webplatform is finally starting to look, feel and “behave” the way I want again, …and I’m testing it now…;) …it’s early morning…, …two teens are getting ready for school, and I’m writing on my iPhone before my morning-yoga and -coffee:) …it’s freezing cold today actually, but one thing I love about january is the darkness in the morning… Going to light the candles soon… Lots of them!!!:)) …then do some yoga… X

…i had the most beautiful dream during nap… Now I have tears in my eyes when I think about how good it felt when you walked towards me, hold your strong arms around me, hugged me, kissed me… Apparently I can’t forget what could have been again if I had only gone to meet you…

What is now and what could have been is two different matters… And I live in the present, although I wish my dream would happen for real… Who wouldn’t…?

What happened? …things changed somehow, but the heart still won’t forget… It may never forget…

Three of the many things I’m going to make a priority this year of 2010, …in attempt to make this year "my year":) …because… How wonderful wouldn’t it be if I at new years eve, knew I had actually sucseeded in these areas? It would be the best start on 2011, and that is exactly the domino-effect I want…:)) The “Joie de Vivre” of being…

1. Travel as much as I can possibly afford… I have for years wanted to travel a lot, and this year I’m making it a priority:) I don’t have more money, but still… It’s all about thinking differently… Celebrating birthdays abroad for example, for the same amount of money it would have cost to do it here with presents and all… Buy clothes to a lower price abroad and then save in on the tickets on what it would have cost her anyway:)

2. Date more randomly, to find "the wildcard" out there… Be very clear that if I’m not committed yet, it means I can date whoever I want… No one "owns" me until I commit publically:) …this is the year I am going to be open to date different kind of men to possibly find what I have spent years searching for… I want to be surprised ♥ :))

3. Really get a routine on my workout, yoga, pilates again… To get back to where I was physically several years ago… I love to do it, just have to make it a priority in a busy week:) It’s all about getting the routine again… A lifestyle sort of…:):))

…to be continued…;) Joie de Vivre!!!:):)

To make a decision about feeling happy, and embrace life:)

Many asks me how I can smile and glow and be so “Joie de Vivre” and “happy”, and I can tell… I’m not always… I have a passionate temper like an italian, but yes I love life and I think that the reason for my ability to focus on moments, love and finding happiness in small things is because my life has never been a picnic.

…so many bad things has happen in my life with horrible deaths and more that has been out of my control and has treaten to ruin my life so many times, and I can’t take away the trauma of it… It will always be like an open wound…, and I can’t change everything around me either… People are people, and things happen. I’m not in control of my surroundings, but I’m in control of the way I embrace life every single day… My happiness is a choice, a decision about being tough, take the challenges and not let other people ruin my life when they act crappy and so on, have a bad day etc. It’s not easy at all, but I choose to be egoscentric about one important thing… My own happiness… Because my own happiness is my responsibility, and it’s not the same as those who talk about being positive all the time no matter challenges… This is something completely different… I can feel sad, cry, be angry…, but still be mainly happy and choose not to let others ruin that… Because to be really happy you have to connect with all your feelings, the bad ones too… And set some boundaries for yourself…, not to let others steel your life sort of… Choose… And mobilize the happy feelings from within your core… Sense your own life… Embrace your time…, be grateful, focusing on love as THE most important thing, and feel each moment… To be present in you own life… Choose to be happy… Choose love as your main mantra in life always… And find your deep core strenght even on the most challenging days by daring to be week… To dare to be week is really to be strong…

I really hope 2010 will be a good year. A year of magical moments worth sharing… Wonderful poetic moments, and lots of beautiful time together with loved ones… A positive adventure and an uplifting life-journey… This is what I wish for both myself, my loved ones, my friends and everone I care about ♥

All the best for the new year from E ♥

This is what I long for in the coming year….

First and foremost I hope everyone I love and care about will stay healthy, and that this year will have less tough challenges than the last ones. Need a good year now, where dreams are fulfilled and more days are filled with beauty… With more moments of joy and love, that aren’t ruined by getting bad news all the time, where I can relax a bit and feel that life is good to me and the ones I love… That is my main dream… To get a year that is just plain and simple in it’s daily wonders…

Then… I have three things I hope for deeply, for myself, for the year of 2010:

1. Fall in love, the way I mean with REALLY falling… Where it tickles in my toes and I feel happy to the core and get chills just by thinking about him… That this happens in a mutual way with the RIGHT man which I can actually live out the love with… That the bits and pieces falls into place…

2. Find the place to live that I’ve DREAMED about… A place to love…

3. Achieve my GOALS according to art and writing during the year… The goals that I’ve set for that particular year…

To make what I can do to achieve my dreams, I will stay as open as possible, to the wonders and possibilities that comes my way… Not plan to much, or try to predict, but go with the flow a bit… Because life is now!!!

I wish everyone I care about a wonderful new year where dreams will be fulfilled and crossroads passed sucsessfully… A year that is better than the last ones… A year of wonders, adventures, beauty, and joyous moments… All the best from E:)